Can you survive an alien abduction?

Can you survive an alien abduction?

You are enjoying an after-dinner burrito in your backyard when a bright light in the sky catches your eye. At first you think it must be the lights of an airplane, or perhaps a particularly bright star you haven’t noticed before – but the light suddenly gets bigger and bigger, shining on the trees in your yard as though it is daytime. 

The light splits into multiple beams in a circular pattern, and you gasp as you realise they are part of a huge, metallic UFO hovering above your house!

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The UFO lowers closer and closer towards you. It is silent as it descends. There is no doubt about it now – it is coming down directly over your backyard. What do you do?

You hardly get a chance to do anything, because suddenly a beam of blinding white light shoots out of the centre of the UFO, directly at you. You squint your eyes against the brightness – and feel your feet leave the ground. The light pulls you up through an opening in the UFO and deposits you inside. You see that you are surrounded by bald, grey-skinned, large-eyed aliens, looking at you expectantly. What do you say to them?

Surprisingly, the aliens speak English. “We’d like to run some tests now,” one of them says. “Please go and sit on that chair.” You’re suddenly very worried – you’ve heard all about the kinds of tests aliens like to perform. When you sit down, however, there is not a probe in sight. Instead, they ask you a question and ask you to choose from one of four answers. You wonder how this could possibly be a good use of anybody’s time. Anyway, the question they ask you is: Which is your favourite colour?

After making a jump into hyperspace (which, admittedly, was pretty fun) the spaceship lands on a planet that looks a lot like Earth, except the oceans are orange and the sky is purple. You are taken into a building and sat down at a table, where a plate of very strange-looking food is placed in front of you. The aliens are encouraging you to eat it. What do you do?

After your plate is cleared away, a particularly well-dressed alien strides into the room. “I am the leader of this world,” the alien says proudly. But before you have a chance to respond, the alien falls unconscious to the floor. You are immediately surrounded by guards, who accuse you of killing their leader with telepathic powers. What do you do?

Can You Survive An Alien Abduction?
You become a conspiracy theorist

As the aliens advance towards you, you pass out from fear – and wake up in your own bed. It was all a dream – or was it? You spend the rest of your life trying to find out…
You don't survive...

Apparently, justice must be served. The aliens pronounce you guilty of killing their leader, and sentence you to death by alien sharks. Oops.
You escape

As the aliens advance towards you, you yell “look over there!” While they are looking away, you throw the contents of your pockets in the direction of the guards, causing them to slip over while they are distracted. In the meantime, you run as fast as you can back to the parked spaceship, leap inside and slam the hatch closed. You set the autopilot on a course back to Earth and zoom off into space, the aliens shaking their fists at you as you depart.
You live on an alien planet

The alien leader isn’t dead after all! The aliens apologise for their accusations against you, which you accept graciously. Over the next few days, you befriend the alien leader and decide to stay on the planet as their most trusted political advisor and personal fashion stylist.